Difference between love and lust
I was so interested in a thread, here, that had me questioning love in books. Not love in romance. Not love in horror. Love in everything.

Two arguments going on here:

First view -
Because love isn't rational. People fall in love with someone who's completely wrong for them all the time.


Second view -
No offense, mate, but your definition of love reeks of romanticism.


Here are my thoughts on it.

Love doesn't make sense, sometimes. I have been under the mercy of love for three years, and I have to say -- there's no reasoning behind it.

BUT

I agree that love begins rational.

What do I mean by that? There has to be admiration. There has to be something that you adore about the person. No one in love can honestly say there's nothing that they respect or admire about their loved one.

And guess what? Not all reasons have to make sense to others. A personal example of this is that I adore Alex because he's a snob. Most people look at snobby people and sigh. Now, I might go into a bit more detail -- he's more of an intellectual snob than a physical snob.

I can't stand morons. I don't mind ignorant people, but if you sit someone in front of me that is an idiot -- I won't spare good manners. He's the exact same way, and in a weird way, I adore it.

So is love rational?
Yes.

Is love irrational?
Actually, no. It makes us feel irrational. It makes us do irrational things. But all in all, there's a reason we feel the way we do.

So let's put this in perspective of writing. Your characters need a reason to love each other. I understand polar opposites create tension, but if you want love, you still need a reason for these two people to be falling in love with each other. There are billions of good looking people on the planet. No one is so pretty that someone ignores all of their flaws. No one. So take physical attraction out of there. Give two people a reason to love, respect, and adore each other -- and it'll be believable. Until then, you've got senseless lust. YA is fuddled with enough of that crap.
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